Friday, June 23, 2006

a promise that matters

Our family consists of three children and I am the youngest of them by some distance. Our parents treated us like their friends. To this day, I never felt any difficulty in telling anything to my mother except on a single occasion.. And that is the matter of this blog.

They call me "Kannan", a name called, first by a maid who looked after the kids.

Scene1: I must be studying in 5th or 6th standard.

pappa: "da..Kannan, go and get me a pack of cigarets from Kuttappu's shop."

amma: "In that case I will give you a list of other things to buy"

Pappa knows driving. And there is car in the shed. He can do this in a matter of minutes. Still he says I should go out in the sun to buy this. This is not fair. (Actually as amma says there is no consistent trait in my personality like laziness) .I have been doing this for him, for some time now and I want to protest.

I went to amma as usual and shouted so that pappa could hear it..

me: "I can't go out to buy cigarets for him. People will think that, I started smoking. Give me the list. I will buy those things only"

I was quite sure that it was not going to happen. If he goes out to buy cigarets, he will buy the groceries too. Inspired by a little success, I shouted again..

me: "I dont like pappa smoking cigarets in the house. It creates a smell in the house which makes me sneeze. If he wants to smoke why can't he do that by just going outside"

amma: "O.K ..enough is enough. When you grow up, you shouldn't become like him. You should never be a smoker"

me: "I will never ever do that. I will never become a smoker like him. Believe me"

amma: "let me see "

To this day pappa has never asked me to buy cigarets for him, nor he smoked inside our home. He did go out when he smoked even after quarreling with amma or me.. Some five years back he completely quitted this habit...

********************************************************************

Scene 2: Years passed.. I graduated from an Engineering colege just like they did some decades ago...I just had to walk through the roads already explored by them... Now the scene is inside a car...Probably I was driving the car.

pappa: "..Kannan what about drinking and smoking habits in your college. I think these habits are reduced in professional coleges. right?."

me: " hmm...Not quite so. Many students do all these even now.."

amma: "What about u??"

It was a question to answer. After a pause I said, trying to be as natural as possible,

me: "hmm...sometimes I do drink with my friends but very rarely, that too during some treats..But I don't SMOKE.."

I vividly remember the conversation that followed. It was quite interesting, but it deviates from the point..I don't think, my mother remembers the promise I made long back..but I do..

Now do I smoke..Have I broken a promise which I made when such things mattered in life..
..Deep inside me, I know there are only two answers a 'yes' or a 'no' . But, I am afraid to tell it.

ps: To my friends in IIT, my friends in REC, my friends in Trichur, and all those who are close to me elsewhere, all what I said here, doesn't apply between you and me.. You know what I am talking about?

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"drinkin"..."smokin".."parents came to knw abt it"...hmmm..a complicated matter to tackle for me...

neway..u handled it far better thn me..

kewl maan...keep on writing

8:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

liked the title more than the text..a promise that matters..usually,most of them dont..

since this one matters,why not try keeping it,be it "yes" or "no" till now..:)

9:53 PM  
Anonymous Prof. M.B. Patil said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

2:29 PM  
Anonymous mathews said...

no comments to the above ......
Bhisma could never confront sikhandi in the war..:)

3:25 PM  
Blogger Naresh said...

i liked the way u said the truth abt drinking to u r parents.requires quite a bit rapport between u and them.

looking forword to the conversation that followed in some other post...:)

10:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

reminds me of the umpteen reasons i invented 4 not smoking or drinking..i dont think my parents wud have bothered too much..and i occasionally wonder if i missed smthin..still dunno why i never started ..but then it gives me somethin more in life..tells me that i'll never be bored with life coz there r umpteen things left to do:)-ur frmr prject partner(there was only 1 who didnt smoke/drink:))

4:12 PM  
Anonymous RC said...

Keeping promises requires strength and sometimes the same is required to break them. I lacked the later. I guess this was the reason I couldn't have those 'bad' habits(as they call it).....

Great work...
Keep going...

1:52 PM  
Anonymous mathews said...

@ anonymous(my proj. mate :D)

In my case there was a slight difference.I saw umpteen reasons for starting it and only a single reason against it as of now...:)

@ r.c
Yes, u r right, but i think it depends also on the way you take the promise also..

Nice to see ur comments

12:38 PM  
Anonymous Deepu Alex said...

da mathai kollamelloda...
nee eppol valiya eazhuthukaranayii ennu kettu...

1:34 PM  
Blogger meinleben said...

hey ...

new to your blog. it was intersting to read this post. But you managed quite well mathews.

i remeber the day when i confessed to my amma that i had voldka, she asked me to leave house . that one week vacation i spent my days roaming around @ thrissur pooraparambu and night at friends place.

it took more than 6 months to convince her to let me be back at home. dont know still she convinced bcoz whenever i say i m not well first question she ask do u still drink :) :)

12:44 AM  

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